A trip

A trip

I am going to go home tomorrow for two weeks and looking forward to the trip.

I will be making two stops, one in Texas, to see my brother and two sisters who live there; be there for 7 days, then go to Vancouver to stay with my sister and her husband.

It will be good to get away and be disconnected from my job, no phone ringing, no dealing with problems at work, time to just have a relaxing good time.

I always come back refreshed when I am gone for a full two weeks, though I want to return after I am gone for one week.  One week does not do it.  I tried it, coming back too early does not work, I need the two weeks.  The one week of missing work, and the people I work with, seems just as important as the first week when I am glad to be away.

One thing that helps me, I am not indispensable, no one is, we can all be replaced.  Knowing that gives me a certain freedom, quiets that part of me that wants to believe that the work place revolves around me; well it does not, thank God.  I have seen people burn out pretty quickly thinking that, they tend to micro manage, the fruit being that people are afraid to do anything on their own.  It is better to encourage everyone to look around, and do what needs to be done; do it themselves or go to the one in charge and let them know.

It is a good job, very meaningful for me, taking care of others, being with them to the end, but common sense has to be used, if not then burn out usually follows in close pursuit.   Our gifts have an underside; compulsive and demanding that has to be dealt with or being a caregiver can soon lead to resentment, a clear sign that a change of thinking and doing is needed, sinse too much is being taken on.   Boundaries and keeping them are important, not only with those I take care of, but also with those with whom I work.  Patients have rights, and as long as they are not doing something that is dangerous to themselves or others then they should be allowed to do as much as they can.  Being direct also helps, steady, stern if needed (rarely needed), and also just letting the one being taken care of that they are loved, while showing some understanding of how they feel getting old and sick, with their ability to take care of themselves slowly fading.  After all one day I will be there, if I live long enough.  I have an idea I will spend a good amount of time when very old saying to myself, “so that is what it was like”.

One last thing on the boundary thing, I don’t always succeed with using the “common sense” thing, hence my need of a vacation.  Common sense has to be learned over and over and over and over again by me……I am tad slow sometimes.

Peace

Mitch

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